nadir

i fell
it's true
i fell
and felled
kept falling and falling
after the ground was pulled out from under me
i no longer knew who or how to be

i got used to the fall
like Alice
reading the writing on the wall
passing the time with wondering
six impossible things unneeded
just the one would do
until i hit bottom

finally knew
my nadir reached
sanity, just barely, unimpeached
nearly Havishamed
so confused
by all the nevers ever said
all the ways the always were waylaid

i dusted myself off
sans cobweb cake
floated back to the world again
in a balloon from a kindly Kansan
on the back of a luckdragon
through the universe in a Heart of Gold
on the wings of Gwaihir
i grew bold

i never mean to disappear in there
but this is an always that is always true

it took
the pages of a book
to bring me back to me
after yet another perfidy

yes, all it took
was a book
to rid me of my blue
to rid me of you