ameliorate

try though i might
still cannot see myself
from outside myself

& could i would i

would i learn finally what evades me
the things that make them go

& if i did
what difference would it make

would it ameliorate
inner dissent/descent into despair
war mercurial vs immutable
is there an unwavering me in there
or are my failings fickle too

& if i changed
for one to suit
would i destroy a me
already perfect
for one i've yet to see