beholden

and i am beholden
to arms that hold me
and fill the hole
towards wholeness

exquisite agony
the rending of a heart
i sat cross-legged
on the cool tile floor
arms wrapped
in a solo hug
and rocked
snotty and sobbing
and certain
i could never
i would never
nothing ever
would be whole again

and i am beholden
to arms that hold me
and fill the hole
towards wholeness 

i nursed the emptiness
and cleansed it
hollowed out
an empty vessel
until you came
and poured
thick golden
honey-molasses hope
coating the sides
filling me up

and i am beholden
to arms that hold me
and fill the hole
towards wholeness