i have tried
tried on hats
and costumes
i have dressed
dressed for jobs i wanted
and jobs i took
done what it takes
to pay the bills
pay my dues
pay my debts
taken up the mantel
until I have become
none
but noughts
an actor manqué
a writer manqué
a lover manqué
a fighter manqué
i fall
and fail
and try again
happy in this
in my own way
in being in becoming
being on my own
my own terms
mine
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