ebullient

princesses aplenty
and ghosts and goblins too
superheroes resplendent
in their capes
the ghouls float by ebullient
tiny witches practice cackles
cats meow and wolfmen howl
all the people
incognito
cloaked in mystery
time creaks on
becoming history
the autumn carnivale
for the kiddies and us all
treats piled in their bags
the sugar high will last
until turkey
brings somnambulance
with winter and it's storms
a rehearsal for the years to come

underwhelm

so overwhelming the beginning...
so underwhelmed the end
the bang and then the whimper
TS got it right, my friend
no happy ever after
a pop and then a fizzle
fireworks set off
in a never-ending drizzle
and so it is and is again
anticipating joy
expect the least
and but hold on, hope...
here comes another boy

pellucid

grey dampness blankets
obscuring and blurring
making a washed out watercolor
of the world
milky nebulous shapes
drift past like dust motes
in the summer sun
diffuse and distorted
in stark contrast to you
a pellucid beacon
reflecting the best of me
back to me
the full moon
lighting up the darkness
turning the tides
I bask in you

delectation

a panoply, this menagerie
leaves whirl and swirl
like dervishes
in a plethora of possibility
they indulge delighted
banqueting on
the pumpkin autumn winds
cuddling in cardigans
with cider and sunset
for their delectation
and each other for exaltation

slapstick

with timing comically bad
and coordination tragically worse
I tumble and stumble
through this concrete jungle
bumbling at a breakneck pace
master of accidental slapstick
a giddy goof grinning and guffawing
to get through the day
til homeward bound
jostling against the other clowns
shoved in our subway clown car
the greasepaint weighs heavy
and we share a weary smile
to hold the tears at bay

victual

Instagram Food Porn 

it seems so silly -
our sustenance
in victual pixels,
a pictorial plenitude
of all our food,
tasty noms
and photo bombs,
and yet, the yum
I also snap
to make jealous
those who lack
the cooking savvy
to best my snacks -
with a hashtag
for hash-browns
my triumphs paraded
and my culinary failures
in compost degraded
unseen by the masses
so reputation unabated
for kitchen MacGuyvering
meals so inspiring
you'll all be wondering how
to get your hands on my
tasty, delicious, gorgeous, nutritious
delectable, savory, scrumptious, full-flavory
chow

impeccable

require the ideal
and disappointed be
the impeccable
is regrettable
it is an end, a wall
flawless is finished
is cold, is distant
unforgiving

messy embraces
and encases
us all

be the best
of your worsts

so you may be you
so I may, too
so we may amalgamate
and incorporate
and make
glorious the indecorous
flauntingly flawed
bodacious and odd
and delight as we err
ever human

flimflam

"it pays to be cautious,
careful and kind"
the mantra she speaks
to herself
after going full-throttle
with choices she ought to
have calmly considered
and guarded against
with common-sense

but here she goes again
despite the evidence
the awful consequence
of an open heart
flimflammed
and scammed
because the alternative
is too much to bear
a jaded life where
the joy depleted
she retreats defeated

better to believe
and be deceived
than never achieve
the soaring bliss
of hope

googol

there is no number great enough

a googol wouldn't cut it

to quantify the moment

we first kissed

a million billion
stars exploding

on a quantum level

when atoms smashed
and quiet dashed

electrons jumped 

for joy
the universe 

expanded

when your lips 

so softly landed

on my own

on a new york city street

the epic and prosaic meet

there and then

and once again
until the end 

replete

In memory, a haven:
a hodge-podge warren
of tumbled jumbled
twenty-somethings
fumbling forward
towards glory.
A bubbling pot of
potential and catastrophe
replete with the requisite
friendships and fights
and flirting and fussing and fun...
and that we are, all,
so many years along,
that we are - 
so far from where we were -
that we are yet,
still, friends
(though time and distance
and commitments dilute)
friends, still,
though friendship now measured
in texts and messages and emoji
instead of daily beers and brawls
and bawling and falling down laughing
and such, and so
my heart with fullness knows
friends we are
haven we were
still home we ever will be

nocebo

These moments haunt,
the ghosts of failures
float above and whisper
pernicious.

Bitter pills,
these words ambiguous
become superstition unshared.
A prayer to no one,
sans rosary,
repeated ad infinitum.

Each conversation dissected;
appraised, every kiss.
And you get lost in this:
are they are innocuous?
Nocebos made sinister by self?

A look, a tone, a smile inscrutable:
signs ignored or imagined?
Self perpetuating paranoiac myth
or innate inevitable mistake?
Was it always so
or did you make him go?

Correlation or causation
you wonder sans cessation
and, either way, he's gone -
a new ghost in your retinue
susurrating. 

capitulate

he carries it with him
like a penance

it bends his back
and slows his step
as he wraps it
around himself

a coarse and cumbersome coat
made of sodden wool
it clings
damp and heavy

he trudges stoically
the weight willing him
to the ground

if only he'd capitulate

and she marches
next to him
through summer
in solidarity

encouraging
cajoling
entreating
imploring
at every step
for him to, please,
please, look up
release the cloth
which burdens him so
to see the sunshine
and feel the warmth of it
on his skin

if only he'd capitulate

but he will not let go
for it guards him
from a winter
she cannot see

oldster

born curmudgeon
with crinkly grin
and wrinkled twinkling eyes
grown into age gracefully
oldster now
old soulster always
shaking your fists
and shouting with aplomb
finally and forevermore
"Get off my lawn!"

blithesome

the lovers kiss on the platform
blithesome and darling and free
enveloped in the invisible
oblivious to the trains
roaring past and bellowing
locked in a moment
lost in each other
we unwitting voyeurs
smile wistfully
as the carriage rolls past
in memory
that kisses
are also
a promise
in memory
of our own
long forgotten love
long forgiven lies
and because
we long
for young lovers' bliss

jurisprudence

the room is filled with the exhausted
the harried and resigned
awaiting with their numbers
and hoping they're declined
my day of jury duty
left me sad for all the rest
when the lawyers
did their voire dire
and then sifted through the mess
in the course of jurisprudence
on a day that never ends
they share their deepest secrets
and hope the judge
them homeward sends
and I sat my fate awaiting
until I was homeward set
for having once been robbed
justice for me never met
and so I've never sat a jury
though fair I hope I'd be
I guess in seven years
we'll have another chance to see

tremulous

i am an autumn leaf
no longer green
and busily bursting forth
hopefully reaching for the sun
time has turned me
i am transfigured into
a darker hue
in amber and russet
i rustle
attached but tenuously
tremulous and unready
to let go
 

miasma

In dank and gloom
the creature creeps
through broken stones
and creaking trees.
It stalks the silly
thrill-seekers
wandering its lot
in the midnight hour
oblivious to shadows;
closing in
on youthful idiocy
and its bottle of gin.
And so it begins
when for them it ends.
A scream unanswered.
A body found,
a bloodied pile
on the ground.
Teens spouting
improbable babble
ignored by authority
as cockamamie twaddle.
So a swirling miasma
of fog and decay,
of distrust and delay
fills the air
rank and noxious -
a portent
of days to come
as one by one
the monster feeds.

affluent

we watch the race from the sidelines
having no wish to run it

who can be
the prettiest
the thinnest
the richest
the most

with all the things
upon their backs
to weight them

these Joneses keep
on running
til their feet
are bloodied stumps

the zombie marathon
rushes past

my friends and I
sip our lemonade
and enjoy the parade
affluent in a different currency

proclivity

kindred spirits: hard to find
glorious weirdos who respond in kind.
sweeter still shared proclivity
discovered in close proximity.
untrammeled joy is ever fleeting.
très triste, was your retreating.
duration brief makes wistful smile;
mischievous eyes shine sans guile.
an open book, pages left blank
i am become yet humbly thank
you for the chapter you helped write.
ephemeral is all delight.
i could have wished it lasted longer
i still could wish that it were stronger
so many caveats i could append
but never "wish it never happened"

delve

into the depths
where demons dwell
we delve deleterious
digging up devils
best left alone
clawing back strata
clumps of muck
to unearth our worst
most vile
decaying and rotted
corpses
the shells of
our previous selves
our basest villains
and in exhumation
hope to purge and burn
and end the scourge
we have become

luminary

diamond
on jeweler's velvet

twinkling flashing

against the inky black

she shines

refracts 

reflects 

luminous luminary 

lead the way

speak for those

too hoarse

to raise their voice

I watch to

see the life 

ahead
of her

remember
the life
in back
of me

and
regret

wooden

i see them at their ease amongst the crowd
the sparkling, glamorous extroverts
and i stand aside;
longing for a book and pajamas
making friends with the wall
the floorboards less wooden than my repartee
and wonder if i would have fit better
in the drawing rooms of old

Jane Austen likely would not have it so

incidence

in a maelstrom
of calamitous catastrophe
the rate of incidence
so commonplace
it's a disgrace
repeated over and over
all the word over
they flee
the storms
the warlords
the massacres
to survive
some even thrive
clinging on to each other
clinging on to hope
in a leaky boat
in a dusty desert
on foot
in hiding
in a search
for a better life
a longer life
a life
undefined by fear
redefined by love
defiant and proud or
broken and bowed
hounded and cowed
they all search
for refuge
for freedom
for a future
and who are you
to tell them no
no
my ancestors escaped
to arrive and thrive
but you must go
no
no
no




To help refugees, please donate to UNHCR
http://donate.unhcr.org/international/general

manqué

i have tried
tried on hats
and costumes
i have dressed
dressed for jobs i wanted
and jobs i took
done what it takes
to pay the bills
pay my dues
pay my debts
taken up the mantel
until I have become
none
but noughts
an actor manqué
a writer manqué
a lover manqué
a fighter manqué
i fall
and fail
and try again
happy in this
in my own way
in being in becoming
being on my own
my own terms
mine

reprise

and so it is again
we take out the script
and run our lines
mouthing the words
reprising our roles
sans conviction
locked in this
kitchen sink drama
we hit our marks
and each other
with insults
and crockery
and snark
and wonder
how did we get here
and how do we leave 

xeric

prickly cacti
standing apart
pointedly
guarding your heart
xeric and wry
your sense of humour
in matters romantic
a rather late bloomer
the most vibrant of flowers
you'll eventually display
after the showers
have come your way
affection discouraged
I'm waiting until
the rains show the world
you bloom lovely still

bailiwick

A hush,
a rustle,
the curtain twitches
and you are home.
This is your bailiwick -
an empty stage
waiting to be peopled
by the multitudes within
for the gratification
of the multitudes without.
Surrounded by your fellows,
well met
and in concert,
you tell truths
wrapped and unwrapped
in fabrication and elocution
for delectation and edification
and applause
and that moment
where words on a page
become a life lived
in acts.
 

extradite

Though he wronged me long ago
I find myself still troubled so.
The faceless monster he became
in memory, is still the same.
I'd extradite him, if I could
from my mind. He does no good
there clogging up my heart with fear,
fending off those who'd hold me dear.
I'd banish and send him to justice
but I cannot seem to trust this.
He built a wall I cannot climb
and oh, so slowly, over time
I've struggled at it, brick and mortar,
to tear it down, give him no quarter,
but still he blocks me, here and there,
encumbrances me everywhere.

haplology

some could call it lazy
the way you abbreviate
the short cuts you took
from you and me to we
but the australian in me
loved your haplology
as we raced headlong
barreling forward together
like children running
with no time for proper form
for diction or elocution
the correct replaced
by merry momentum
and our delight in it all

spontaneous

we collide
like atoms smashing
with words rapturous
and kiss spontaneous
electrons jumping
in exuberant
yet elegiac form
an explosion
of creation
heralding a universe
expanding ever outward
until the stars die
and we with them

consternation

sits at the table
feet swinging below their perch
hand grips crayon
determination radiates outward
tiny face scrunched
in adorable consternation
at the lines
to be colored within

the attempt
at conformity
soon abandoned
for raucous
wild scribble

so the tone set
for a life to come

I see it all
in a faded
photograph
of a you
i never knew

but have always
always known